Needing a Friend

Lately the characters of GH have been keeping some unusually cast of characters as their friends.  Everyone seems to be all of a sudden be-friending people you would not find likely as real life friendships.  As RC works to stuff more of his OLTL pets into our GH canvas I am sure we will see more of this.  But for now lets just look at this unlikely cast of friends these days.
First we have Michael and Starr.  What would Abbey think of this? I kind of miss Abbey Haver some days.  She kept Micahel centered. But now Michael is more 'mature' and that is a relief because wow those were rough the last 16 yrs watching that character grow up.   Now if you get past the whole way Starr and Michael met, here is what I see: two extremely selfish, self absorbed brats of rich families and think they are entitled to everything.  Okay so maybe they would make a good pair of friends considering they appear to be cut from the same cloth. 

That brings us to another self centered character - Kristina - why did they bother bringing back her character? I mean Krissy is probably the most spoiled pain in the rear ever to grace GH besides her father and brother of course.  But now we have Krissy who has be-friended a TV producer who clearly has her best interests at heart.  There is clearly nothing but true friendship going on there - HA! I personally think this whole Krissy storyline is a waist of air time.  I liked Lexi as Krissy and I loved how she interacted with the Davis women.  This new Krissy is NO LEXI send her back from where she came from.

This bring us to the other weird friendship of Carly and Todd.  That just seems too random.  Why would Carly be friends with Todd???? If Carly was smart she would keep her distance.  Todd should go back to Landview or somewhere else, give Sam back her baby and take that crazy coo coo bird Heather with him. 

Now, of course is the Liz and Jason friendship.  Liz can't be friends with a man it is not in her DNA.  Every man in her history that she has been 'just friends' with somehow ends up father one of her brats.  I don't know what it is about her needy personality but she can't seem to keep any man she tries to be friends with out of her bed.  Eventually she lures them in manages to poke holes in every condom on the eastern seaboard and bam! 9 months later can't figure out who the father is of her kid.  She is just not capable of this and it is clear with Jason.  She is so hot for him it is hilarious to watch.  She is trying to be 'supportive' of his love for Sam and his problems but all the while she is trying to calculate how she is going to get him back.  We all know it.  She has put up a good front though.  I mean she was nice enough to Jason by listening and telling him to give Sam space.  But in the end that chick wants him badly and she is going to convince herself while he talks all about Sam, wears a wedding ring and confesses his love for Sam every minute of every day somehow he is really after her.  Poor Liz.  Can't they find this poor girl a man that actually wants Liz for Liz and doesn't want her to be their shoulder to cry on or just a stand in for someone else?  I feel for Liz and all but I hope RC realizes too that if he screws too much with JaSam he is going to get that show canceled because we will all stop watching.
Please hear me on that point, RC - Please be intelligent about your audience enough to know this, you can put us through a lot of JaSam angst and we will tolerate it but break them up for good and you are going to find you have very few viewers and fans left.  Let me be crystal clear on that one.

As for John and Sam's relationship it is clearly just platonic.  Sam needs a friend.  Sam has never been real good at keeping friends.  She was friends with Maxie when Maxie was Maxie but now we have NuMaxie and who the heck would want to talk to that whining sniveling mess.  Sam doesn't need a friend like that anymore.  Sam needs a friend and that is all John is to Sam, a friend.  She needs someone to listen and not judge her, offer suggestions or tell her what a great guy Jason is right now.  She needs someone to just listen.  She just lost her child and she thinks it is Jason's fault.  Her sole mate just  ripped her heart out and stomped on it.  So, yes, she needs a friend that has no connection to Jason.  Since partially every female in PC that she isn't related to has either slept with Jason or is related to him, naturally she needs a friend from the outside of town.   I know we have a McBAM kiss coming up but just remember to take that news with a grain of salt.  Not all spoilers turn out to be as clear as they are written once on screen.  KEEP THE FAITH! I for one think it will be a mistake and misunderstanding and quickly dismissed.  DON'T READ TOO MUCH INTO THE BS, KEEP THE FAITH!!!
Write and keep the faith to GH.  Let RC know your love for GH and your love for JASAM!  Don't lose your head now! Keep calm and keep focused.  Jason and Sam are sole mates.  They belong together and it is not 2007 all over again. 

Do Not Stand At My Grave And Cry

"Do not stand at my grave and weep" by Mary Elizabeth Frye
Do not stand at my grave and weep,
I am not there, I do not sleep.
I am in a thousand winds that blow,
I am the softly falling snow.
I am the gentle showers of rain,
I am the fields of ripening grain.
I am in the morning hush,
I am in the graceful rush
Of beautiful birds in circling flight,
I am the starshine of the night.
I am in the flowers that bloom,
I am in a quiet room.
I am in the birds that sing,
I am in each lovely thing.
Do not stand at my grave and cry,
I am not there. I do not die

This poem was first written in 1932 by Mary Elizabeth Frye  but many versions of this poem have been read at funerals for almost 70 years.  It is sometimes referred to as the funeral poem.  It was so fittingly selected for the poem for today's show and focus. When you experience a loss of this proportion no words can express your pain but some words can bring some comfort.   This poem reminds its readers that the person they mourn did not die because they live on in their memories and hearts.  Life does not end with death. 

Of course we know Sam's baby didn't die at all which makes this poem slightly ironic but all the same it made a perfect backdrop for our couple to talk today.

Last week I was pretty bitter about GH.  I was ready to write the whole thing off.  I felt like it was 2007 all over again but instead of Sam being the bad guy this time it was Jason. I stopped watching then for 2 years and I was ready to give up on the show after 25+ years of watching again. .  I was angry and soooo  frustrated about how this whole storyline had played out.  I wanted to call RC and tell him how he and ruined everything.  How he stole our baby story, how he wrecked a perfect couple, how he had ruined my perfect show.  I was really angry.  This past weekend I was so angry I almost removed this blog.  I was ready to write a signing off letter of absolute disgust  with the whole show.  I know I am not alone I know there are some of you out there that feel the same way.  But luckily I read some more positive views on the current story line at hand on various message boards that are a little more pro JaSam then pro Jizzer.  I also read some very insightful comments to past blogs I have written from some of you that reminded of me to look at things in a different perspective and try to see the positive. 

So thanks to many of you who read my blog, I am back and going to try to look at things in a positive light.  In 2007 a lot of people hated Sam for what she did to Jake.  That is when Jizzers became Jizzers.  But honestly (and the next few comments were posted by Lara a reader and GH fan ) maybe RC is actually a Sam fan.  Maybe he is trying to right what once went wrong with Sam's character.   Sam did nothing wrong in any of this. She was raped and had all of this happen to her but she is no victim she is doing her best to cope.  But Jason was the one that chose to be jealous over McBain then to actually be a mature adult about things and set this whole thing into motion.  Jason is no angel and never has been but RC showed that jealousy can cause even previously-thought-to-be-perfect Jason do things without thinking and out of jealousy. It even had some Jizzers thinking, "whoa if Jason can do this to Sam maybe we don't want him with Liz." RC showed the flip side of the coin and showed perfect Jason is far from perfect.  Jason keeps saying he didn't have time to think and process what happened but now he has time and he regrets so much.  But what is important is what Jason does now and going forward. 

Today Jason took a big step in being Jason again.  Today it took everything in Jason not to pull Sam into his arms to comfort her.  He wanted to but he knew that would scar her off.  Today Sam didn't scream at Jason in angry but actually allowed him to help her just a little.  They were honest with each other and took the first teeny tiny step in healing.  Today Sam let Jason comfort her a little.  He knows more then anyone the pain she is feeling right now. He knows how much Sam wanted to be a mother always.  She didn't have to pretend to be holding it together with Jason.  She could just be there.  Sam reached out for Jason as she read the poem.  She needs him but she just isn't sure she can forgive him but deep down she wants to.  But there is the honest fact that her child died (or so she knows it to be fact) and she can't move past Jason's role in all of it.  Not just yet.  I think the reason Sam ran away today was it was too much too quick.  She is still grieving and trying to breathe on breath at a time.  She can't think of how to move forward with Jason yet.  She loves him and he loves her.  There is so much love between them but there is also so much hurt.  Hurt can't be swept under the rug or just put on a shelf.  Jason poured his heart out today and he showed Sam he wanted her home with him.  But she isn't ready for that yet.  She needs to grieve and she is afraid if she moves back in with Jason it will all just be forgotten.  'So much has happened' and that is true.  Jason was MIA on Sam and looked at her so differently knowing that she was carrying Franco's baby.  You can't just forget that.  Nor can she just forget that the baby died because he did not get medical attention.  Jason did pour his heart out today and try to prove to Sam he is ready to stop focusing on the wrong things but it is going to take more then that to fix this. 

Best Quotes of the day
Jason to Sam: No matter what has happened, I am still your husband.  So come home with me.
Jason to Sam: I know how much we have hurt each other, but  I still love you and I think you love me too, come home, come home.
Sam to Jason: I promised I would love you forever and I will
Sam to Jason: Like nothing ever happened?
Jason to Sam: It happened but we can move on from it together, please just tell me you are willing to try.

Keep watching and keep the faith.  Keep reminding me to do the same.  Don't give up yet.  This summer may prove to really test our patience but I am going to try to stay positive this time and try to remember JaSam are the reason we watch and lets keep supporting them.

Reality Setting In

If you have ever experienced a loss or a tragedy of a large magnitude you often find yourself asking yourself this question, how did this happen? You also hope that this tragedy hasn't happened somehow, that this is a horrible dream and you will wake up soon and it will all be over.  However, slowly and sadly reality sets in.

For Sam today she felt reality set in.  She woke to a cold hospital room and with empty arms for a second time.  To wake up and know you have lost your child once is gut wrenching and horrible but to have to do it twice.  I can't even imagine.  Sam is justified to ask questions and she is justified to be angry - very angry.  Why did this happen again?! How did this even happen?  The baby was alive and then he wasn't.  Why didn't John come back?  Sam is no dummy she knows something delayed John.  She knows John pretty well and he wasn't about to just leave her here why did he just not come back?  Sam is very sharp (do you hear that RC?!?) and she is a PI it is only going to take Sam about a nano second once leaving the hospital to start piece things together.  Jason is the reason John didn't come back.  It is Jason's fault that her baby was switched.  That part is true.  Jason better be smart and tell Sam before someone else does because if he doesn't hell hath no fury Jason Morgan!

Sam and Jason have had a rough road of marriage so far.  They love each other but she lied to Jason to protect him about Robin then about the whole Franco's your brother and the baby's father deal.  But NONE of those lies caused a baby to die.  NONE of those lies resulted in a death (or so Jason knows at least).  Here are the facts Jason has to come to terms with and it is only the facts.
1.  Jason could not forgive himself enough to love Sam's baby
2.  Jason decided to be jealous over John McBain instead of try to work things out with Sam
3.  Jason hired the thugs
4.  Jason's realization that he could love the child because he loves Sam was just a little too late to matter

The truth is, yes Sam has lied a lot since the rape.  But she was raped and trying to make sense of things and protect Jason.  Jason had no reason except pure jealous to have those thugs go after John.  Jason, of course, didn't know Sam had just had her baby and that  he would be the cause for all of this pain.  But Jason did hire those thugs.  Something Sam did back in 2007 and he was completely enraged by her jealousy but yet he did it anyway.  Jealousy and anger make people to crazy things, don't they, Jason?  Welcome to reality Jason.  You now know you are capable of causing the worst kind of pain.  You would not forgive Sam for knowing Jake was kidnapped and hiring thugs, so why should she forgive you when you are the reason her baby "died"?  How's the shoe fit you now that it is on your foot Jason?

Sam is completely justified in being upset with Jason today. I loved how she got angry over Jason bringing up Carly.  Jason was trying to tell her he loved that baby too and that he wanted to be with her and be a part of the family but he didn't get a chance to.  I hope he gets a chance to but Sam has every right to be angry and upset.  I really hope Sam can forgive Jason but I would understand her not being able to - realistically speaking. 

I really hope Sam and Jason come thru this whole mess stronger and more in love then ever.  I hope he believes her when she says she knows her son is still alive.  I hope he has faith in her and fights like hell for their love the way Sam has always fought for Jason. 
Do you hear that RC??? - Jason loves Sam and he needs to fight for her! The true JaSam fight for each other and tell the truth! Stop changing who they are!. 

It is what it is

I have to admit I have started and deleted this post several times.  Friday Sam gave birth to her baby.  I viewed this with my own level of frustration.  This is not how I wanted this to happen but it is what it is.  I was frustrated because this is not how I wanted to whole thing to play out.  I never wanted the baby's paternity to be in question nor did I want this pregnancy to be so absent of any happiness.  I wanted Jason to be there and help Sam deliver her baby.  I wanted Jason to confess he loved this baby no matter what months ago.  But it is what it is.  So in order of what Jason and Sam are always saying, we too need to stop looking back, we can not change the past.  We can not change what has happened, what is important is what we do now going forward.

So let's move forward - even if it is painful and hard at times.  So lets focus on the good as hard as it might be.  Friday Sam gave birth to a darling baby boy on Friday.  He was prefect in every way.  His entrance was dramatic but all the same this is a soap opera what are the chances of a normal delivery.  Of course we know he is Jason's biological son and Heather messed with the DNA test, we were reminded by the fact the baby looks exactly like Jason.  This is the child we have all wanted for the last 8 years so lets just enjoy the fact he is here.  Ten tiny fingers and ten tiny toes, big blue eyes and the trace of blonde hair he is the baby we have waited for.  Here he is.  Much like most of real life fantasies about our future children, this didn't happen the way we planned exactly.

Today Jason finally came around, Jason finally realized what we have all realized for so long.  He finally realized that he loves Sam and this baby is part of her so he loves this child already.  Jason also finally called this child 'my son'.  Too bad this all came at a price that Jason was the root cause of.  If Jason had never pushed Sam away, should would have never moved out, she would have never go into labor with John being the only person there, John would not have been her only ride the hospitial and she would never had wondered off and collapsed.  However, it is what it is.  Today's show was horrifying to me.  First, Tea's baby is really not alive which I really find upsetting that we have yet another dead baby storyline.  I just find this type of storyline over done.  Secondly, Sam collapses trying to find the baby help and evil Heather is right there to trade off Sam's baby to anyone who is passing by.  It was horrifying that this are the twists in the plot line.  But it is what it is.  The good part is Jason is ready to be part of this family and is ready to fight for them.  Though today I was glad John kind of made it clear to Jason his lack of interest in Sam until now might be part of the reason she has been having such a hard time so far.     I hope this baby doesn't stay with Tea long.  I do feel for Tea and her loss but Sam should get to a mother to her own child's mother.  I really hope that part wraps up soon and Jason and Sam can be happy soon.  I am ready for Jasam happiness it has been a really long time since we got it.  Keep the faith even if it is HELL at a times.  Jason and Sam will be happy again I really hope.